If you must do a garden tool-related stunt, at least shove a spade up someone's ass. Rectal bleeding makes me laugh.

Between the dramatic, prepubescent voice-over guy and the shithead who got bit, the only one in this video I can stand is the rabid fox.

As it turns out, smaller testicles and dick pimples are not the only side effects of steroids.

No one expected taking the kids to the park to feed the ducks would scar them for the rest of their shitty lives.

This is sorta like a deer walking up to a hunter in the woods and handing him a shotgun. But it's pretty fucking cool.

This is actually just the cop's brilliant tactic to make the pain in the victim's arms go away. It worked surprisingly well.

If you wanna give a girl bigger tits, just get her pregnant. That's what I usually do.

Next up: cutting your hair with a chainsaw.

Of course the porn involved kids who are typically hanging upside down from a jungle gym yelling, "Mommy look at meeeee!"

Just think, if he would've actually succeeded, this video would've been posted higher up on the page.

I have no idea how or why this happened, but it turned out okay. It's a Christmas miracle!

And for today's classic video that's already been posted on every other site that ever existed: the extra in Teen Wolf who exposed himself in the background of a scene.