She only takes her clothes off for shelter and guys that know how to get high off dog turds. That's some master's degree shit - feel privileged.

At first you'll wonder why this is categorized under Funny. Then you'll hear the faggy sounds emitted at the :40 second mark and it will all make sense.

Ashton Kutcher Jr gets scare of his life after screwing Shalyndria out of a potential shopping spree at Target. Lesson learned: when it comes to stolen goods, don't fuck with the black community.

Hajeet accepts defeat after his his 30 second doggystyle session is abruptly cut short. Another night of blue balls for Hajeet.

He survived, but is too scared to masturbate on a public bus ever again. He'll never find love now.

In retrospect, taking advice from a 6'2 guy who's face looks like Google maps for date rapists turned out to be a horrible idea.

He went from average white dude to a Asian girl dating a black man in under 5 seconds. That has to be some sort of record.

Planet Earth's entire demographic for rubber vaginas and Anime team up to find true love. And this time it's not in the woods wearing a pair of baby blue sweatpants.

Asia: Revolutionizing the porn industry since 1978.

Odd. I kinda expected spring break in eastern Europe to have a lot more penises than that.

It's still not quite as effective as Loaded 9mm I stole from my daddies sock drawer stance. But this is a defenseless teenager we're talking about here, not a corner store deli.

People going face-first into the pavement no laughing matter. But we're talking someone who uses cats as toilet paper here, so it's fucking hilarious.