I can't wait for Tila Tequila to try this at her next show. While covered in baby oil.

We're outsourcing stripping now? My sister's gonna need a second job, fast.

Hey Trojan, I found your new condom commercial. No reproduction for me, thanks.

His future in BMX isn't looking good, but there's a light at the end of the painting-the-street-with-your-face tunnel. He'll be an assistant manager within 6 months.

Congratulations - You're Mexican now!

Fuck, just give her the damn food! The aftermath of eating whatever barn animal goes in that deep fryer is far worse then the damage you can do with your fists.

Keep making basketball shorts your attire of choice and these hits are only going to keep getting harder.

Why do they do this? According to the Internet at least 90% of their women make love to goldfish. With statistics like that it wouldn't make sense for them not to do this.

I know a certain somebody that's been studying in Russia.

Finally - a summer activity fat chicks can be part of other than being cute girl's portable shade.

Well if they don't get laid now, nothing short of moving to Korea and finding a blind hooker that plays Starcraft 2 via Braille is going to make it happen.

That was a close one. Someone almost had to be given $20 to make a tribute video to him for MTV to use in between commercials for Jersey Shore.